Glorious Limited Reserve Japanese Ninja-Picked Yagyu Matcha
Operating on the sound principle that anything done by ninjas is inherently better, our staff carefully selected the infamous Yagyu family of certified Japanese stealth assassins to take command of the well-known Maruichi Green Tea Farm by slaughtering all its workers and their families. Making skillful use of their shuriken throwing knives or neko-te cat's claws, our ninjas, clad in black and cloud gray, carefully remove and gather only the tenderest buds and the top two leaves of new growth, all in the depths of darkest night or foggy twilight to avoid detection. Under the cover of smoke bombs, they gather the tea leaves as they fall toward the ground, employing their characteristic feline swiftness to do so, and then take the leaves to their hidden lair for processing. There, using appropriately named tetsubo clubs, they pulverize the leaves into the finest matcha.
Because ninjas are few and hard to find (and live to tell about it), our stock of this Glorious Limited Reserve Japanese Ninja-Picked Yagyu Matcha is very rare and valuable, and may be purchased only with gold bullion. Whistle in the way of the nightingale, at your window at midnight, for more details.
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